You are incomparable. So is the other person. Never compare.

“A flower does not compare itself to the flower next to. It just blooms.”

Dear Friend,

Do you compare yourself with others?

I do, sometimes it's helpful when it inspires growth in me and opens optimal potential within my experiences.

However, there is the danger of comparing myself to others in an unhealthy manner and then I find myself slipping into thoughts and feelings of despair. Like a weed, it can quickly become rooted. I begin to spiral out of alignment with my core connection, necessary growth, and path of least resistance to my optimal life. When this happens, it can contribute to feeling anxiety, depression, shame, envy, leading to self-criticism, lack of self-worth and it rapidly undermines my confidence.

Does this sound familiar?

In the evolutionary framework of survival, having a mental ability to compare our capabilities with others', or to sort out whether we might be acceptable to another social group was necessary for our growth as humans. It makes a lot of sense, especially if the foundation of our decisions are locked into “life or death ” situations. 

However, in the present times, this outcome from the past can tip from being helpful to our survival to being unhelpful to our daily life. This learned habit to judge ourselves in comparison to others is hardwired in our brain, a prejudice against ourselves that was trained into us since childhood. We pay more attention to what we see as our own weaknesses about us, we compare and measure ourselves negatively. We often then drop into a pattern of despair and stop all forward progression. The more you put your attention on something, the more it tends to show up giving us evidence that what we think is true.

When we learn to take a more balanced view and consciously look for and acknowledge the positives about us, receive the compliments when they arrive, lean into the affirming praise, we begin to take on a more balanced perspective about ourselves.

We begin to free up our energy and feel better, entering back into "our unique rhythm and flow" with life.

When we commit to learning how to manage unhelpful thoughts, we begin to understand our mind is defending its own prejudice against itself. These are simply thoughts and not facts. You can learn to let these go and redirect your focus building a positive prosperous flow to your optimal life experience.

One way to shift out of the comparing and despairing cycle and come into a more balanced view is to adopt a mindfulness practice. Try this simple conscious breathing practice ~
4/7/8 breathing practice to begin shifting your perspective now.
Find yourself in a relaxed position
Close your eyes
Inhale fully
On the exhale -> gently place the tip of your tongue on the roof your mouth behind your two front teeth
Inhale slowly for 4 counts
Hold your breath for 7 counts
Exhale slowly for 8 counts
Repeat for 4 cycles (no more than 4 cycles in one practice)
Click here for a guided MP4 version to help make this a daily practice!


Do you want help with shifting your tendency to compare and create spiral despair thoughts and feelings?

I would love to help you!

For the rest of April through May 15th I’m offering a 60 min intuitive coaching spotlight session to help you let go of your habit to compare and despair. I will assist you in building a new habit that supports growth and positive thinking focused on your optimal life.

Your investment $175
https://paypal.me/organicwellness/175

I look forward to connecting with you soon!
Love, Cheryl


PS ... click here to join me in me in my FREE webinar Introduction to balancing your masculine and feminine energies.
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