I have recently had the opportunity to experience the Magic of my Open Heart, and not in the way one might think.

Dear Friend,
I hope this email finds you revealing yourself in the Magic of your Open Heart!?

Yes, the magic of your open heart!

I have recently had the opportunity to experience the Magic of my Open Heart, and not in the way one might think.

Before I say more to that, let me backtrack to earlier this year.  Some of you may remember in June I made my way across country with my Beloved Steve to Mirror Lake NH where he left me and returned to AZ. One month after arriving, in the light of the New Moon on July 23rd I went into an alchemical event of a very disruptive transformation which lasted three months, when I began to come back to life in the light of New Moon on October 19th.

During this time, I revealed to myself shadow patterns of rejection that were operating in my life and spent my time physically unable to participate and dependent on my tribe, a close circle of Steve and women who gave me the permission and resources I needed to surrender and let go and know myself and the family cared for.  

During my downtime, I did lots of inner work which was physically, mentally and emotionally painful, but liberating. My biggest challenge and fear was to heed my Spirits message "to not out-create my experience to meet the expectations of the life I had in motion; instead to give myself permission and allow a deep surrender and letting go."
I have been a Law of Attraction and Mind Mastery teacher for years, out-creating my undesired experiences was a well-developed skill I learned to survive, then eventually thrive.  It felt irresponsible and unethical to not strive to meet my commitments.  

However, my Higher self was insistent, and I began to see more clearly in the light the lies of my shadow patterns and how they were operating.  How I was building core parts of life with energy patterns of rejection, built in to keep me playing small and striving to fit in, be liked, needed and wanted. These patterns revealed my being rejected or my rejecting the greatest gifts of my deepest wants, needs and desires of myself and others. The more I surrendered, the more I welcomed the painful process of recapitulating every memory/ experience of my life and seeing them whole in the salve of unconditional love within me and in the relationship connections supporting me.    
    
In this place I revealed to myself people, places and situations that were aligned with me in the space of unconditional love and the release of people, places and situations that were in the space of conditional relating from their agenda and reflecting to me the lies I had been telling myself from the perspective of rejection.  These people had been teaching me about the energy of permission and the powerful difference between "needing someone's permission to be fully expressed" and "giving myself permission and living fully expressed".     

When we need someone's permission to be fully ourselves we tend to hide/ reject the parts of ourselves we think will not be acceptable to them and they usually reflect us as unacceptable in some way. And so, the cycle goes ...

Fast forward to today; in my unravelling the parts of a life built from the "fear of rejection" I've humbled to release the lies I have told myself and others about my availability for sharing in unconditional love and have revealed myself vulnerable to my deepest needs and wants and to being unconditionally available to the deepest needs and wants of another.

In comes the Magic of my Open Heart!
I recently have humbled to release the lie I held in place in my relationship with Steve, the lie I told to protect me in my rawest and truest vulnerabilities to avoid the possible unbearable pain of rejection, disappointment and self-loathing. This lie between us created much pain. The lie was that I didn't need his fullest gaze on me, that I didn't want a fully expressed union with him, that he was not enough for me, that I was not enough for him, that the gap in our differences was to wide ... blah, blah, blah. In telling this lie, I held back my fullest expression of love for Steve and rejected him and felt rejected by him perpetuating the pain of rejection within both us.

This realization saddens me deeply and has blown my heart wide open all at the same time.  For the first time in my experience with Steve, I am revealing myself fully transparent and vulnerable.  In doing this though I can see in hindsight all the love and tender presence I held back and blocked in receiving and giving what was most needed or wanted for each of us to feel deeply, witnessed, cared for, connected and loved whole.

This makes me sad and its painful at times to witness how greedy in Love I had been in the shadow of rejection. At the same time, it has blown my heart open because the lie has been revealed and I cannot hide anymore from myself, Steve or life!

The true Magic of an open heart happens when are free to intimately relate in our deepest needs and wants without fear of rejection.
I cannot hold back sharing my greatest gifts any longer with life and therefore, I cannot help but receive fully what life has to offer.

I am learning about the nature of my fearful condition-rejection and lack of commitment to my happiness AND I am learning equally the power of unconditional love and its commitment to my happiness and happiness of another.
I am accepting that I have a deep desire to Unconditionally Belong/ Matter- to myself, to another and to life; a desire to be unconditionally witnessed, listened to and cared for in the places I feel most vulnerable in my fear and power.  

I am accepting that I have a deep desire to be an unconditional witness, listener and tender presence for another in the places they feel most vulnerable in their fear and power.

I am not saying that I alone was responsible for Steve's experience in our story of love.  I believe we chose each other energetically because we shared this lie, this shadow pattern, and knew in the light of "our love" that it would reveal, and we would courageously own it; dissipating its power and revealing us whole.  Free now to Love in any form we choose!
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I am saying that we choose how we show up for ourselves, the people we love and life in every moment. We have a responsibility to All of Life and it begins with self- awareness and managing our life energies (mentally, emotionally and physically), coupled with the courage to embrace the truth of what is revealed and to take inspired actions. When we commit to this we become the sweetness of life-expressed and inclusive of the nature of our fear and power, the shadows and light of being human beings fully expressed and witnessed whole.

• Are you feeling disconnected from very important people, places and situations in your life?          
• Do you have needs, wants and desires that you are unable express, so you just pretend they don't exist and tell yourself and others a lie about what's true for you?      
• Do you ignore the needs and wants of the people closest to you denying them the gift of your unconditional love and presence?  
• Do you require the permission of others to be fully expressed in your life?

If you have said yes to any of the above, you may be living in the lie and shadow of rejection.     
You may be isolating from your own needs, wants and desires as a human being and blaming others for your deep feelings of disconnect.
You are missing out on the greatest gift you can give and receive, to be intimately transparent and vulnerable with yourself,  other and life.

Are you ready for change?
                                                                                                              
Call or email me now!
Phone
978-378-0506
Email Me
Sweet Blessings,
Cheryl
Ps ...  
Reminder
Join me live this Thursday and learn more about what continues to shift and change within me and how my leading-edge growth experience can benefit you! 
Register here: http://events.r20.constantcontact.com/register/event?llr=cq4jspdab&oeidk=a07eew052g24f78faf5